They’re building a Target and some other big chain stores in my neighborhood (Columbia Heights). The good news is that it should raise property values in my neighborhood and enable me to laugh all the way to the bank when I eventually sell the fortress. The bad news is that it won’t be finished for another year or two. Since my friend, Sailor Moon, is visiting and my washing machine is still broken (the washing machine elves didn’t fix it overnight) I needed to run out to buy some sheets for the guest bedroom so that she doesn’t think I hate her and that’s why I made her sleep on dusty linens. (My house is construction site so everything is dusty). A Target in my neighborhood would’ve been really convenient. And if the DC government hadn’t stalled Target for 5 years, it would already be there. But if you want to invest millions in DC, bring jobs, benefit the citizens and increase tax revenues, DC will treat you like a tranny hooker at an evangelical church.
So, I NEED some sheets right now, but I don’t want to drive all the way to the Target in VA (which is at least ½ hour each way—or 45 minutes if you drive like I do). So I went to this place next to the evil Home Depot on Rhode Island Avenue because I assumed they might have some. They did. I got there right before closing and unfortunately didn’t have time to peruse their other wares. I HAVE to go back there because I saw THIS:
Hundreds of old skool Kung Fu DVDs for $4 each. HOLY CRAP! They had a bunch from the Wu Tang series, but the place was closing and they were shooing me out before I could find out if they had the really good ones that left an indelible imprint on my childhood brain on Saturday Mornings. You know, the awesome ones, like Shaolin Master Killer, Clan of the White Lotus and the Citizen Kane of old Skool Kung Fu Movies: The Five Deadly Venoms.*
It need not be said that: You will be mine...oh yes, you will be mine!
*Some people think that Executioners from Shaolin is the Citizen Kane of Kung Fu Movies. IT's not. THe plot is a lot like Clan of the White Lotus, so I would say Executioners is like the Godfather II of Kung Fu Movies.