Friday, February 01, 2008

It's raining Cats...and a Dog

I hate this weather more than a college socialist hates a bar of soap. Although the heat seems to be working fine at the ninja fortress, I am always not-so secretly worried that it will start leaking all over the place, I will be stuck without heat and they will find my lifeless frozen body wrapped in the infamous sweater, that while toe-ing the line between european metrosexuality and gayness, is remarkably warm. Then the coronors will come and while i'm in a body bag they will go through my p0rn collection and steal the good stuff. I don't care about most of it, but I would like to be buried with the Brianna Banks one, so although it's not in my will, if any of you are at my funeral, make sure no one takes it out of my coffin when they are pretending to mourn my passing. Anyway, part of the reason...well, actually most or the reason I worry about the heating system is that I did the plumbing work on them. I think I'm okay at soldering pipes now, but I definitely learned by trial and error (and error and error) and I worry that some of those early experiments will come back to haunt me like Frankenstein's monster.



The weather is really getting on my nerves because I started fostering a rescue dog and part of that means getting up every morning at 5:30 am to walk him. This is not fun under the best circumstances, but it reaaaaaaally sux when it's 15 degrees out, like last week, or when it's raining like today. And when dogs get wet they shake themselves dry, but they usually wait until they get inside to do it....nice. On my hardwood floors. Mutherflower!!!


He's a good dog and if I take him for a short run in the moring (I can't do a long run unless it's in a dream sequence involving zombies) he naps for several hours, but if I don't take him for a long run, he's got a lot of pent up energy and I've got nice stuff that I don't want him taking his frustrations out on, so jogging it is.


I'm still adjusting to this giant rat that I saved from certain death, but I'll post more about that soon. Right now, I'm drinking tea (no, I'm not British) because the girl in our office who makes coffee is out sick today so it's either walk a half block to Starbux or drink this urine colored grass water. I don't know how sick she is, but she better have a broken leg or a failed kidney because I need my coffee and tea is for old ladies. That's right, lady, I don't care about your "flu" because it's all about me, me, me!!! And my dog...

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

awwwwwwwwwwww! CUTEST.DOG.EVAH! you should keep him!!!

cat lover said...

What's the differenct between fostering and adopting? You are keeping the dog in your house overnight, right?

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

You can't walk half a block? Or make coffee yourself? My God, man! You remodel stuff! You've soldered metal!

Heat + Water + Coffee = um...Coffee!

iloveupstate.com said...

love your writing/posts/blog... but my gay male friends wouldn't be caught dead in that sweater...not even the gay european ones...cute dog...keep him...pretty please.

SAILOR MOON said...

omg, the puppykins looks like my rat terrior, except mines cuter! i hope u keep him. Sooner or longer u will want a companion that doesnt nag all day long. This companion will only want to lay next to you while you work.....

HomeImprovementNinja said...

anon: thanks, I'll think about it.

Anon cat lover: Im taking care of it till they find a 'forever' home for it

You can call me, 'Sir: it's about laziness, not skillz

iloveupstate.com: thanks, but your gay friends wouldn't wear that sweater b/c it's euro.

SAILOR MOON: thats the plan

Anonymous said...

Dog. Is. Precious.

And he is so not going anywhere. I can tell--you love him.