Stop with the Michael Jackson Stories already

Alright, alright already. The guy is dead and he hasn't had a hit record in 20 years, why do we need to keep talking about him when we are fighting two wars and a recession? His music sucked back then, and it hasn't gotten any better, so why is it impossible to turn on the radio and hear anything besides that crappy pop from the 80s? My iPod is working overtime since I'm avoiding the radio for the next few days.

sometimes the mountain comes to mohammed

Well, I finally got rid of that huge pile of debris in my driveway. After dealing with the junk removal guy who flaked on me, and the one who left a flier, but wouldn't return my phonecall (which sorta defeats the purpose of putting a flier on my door, but I digress), I was sitting home on monday, which I happened to have off. I heard a knock on the door, and an old, wiry, black man was there when I answered it. He offerred to take the junk out of my driveway with his pickup truck. I didn't think it would all fit in his pickup, which had been modified to have higher sides, but he said it would, and offerred to do it for $180.

I said yes, if for no other reason than to see someone try to fit all that stuff into one pickup. Turns out, I was right, it was 3 full pickups. He, and his helper (who I think was his son, because he was calling him dad), got rid of it pretty quickly even though I was worried that the bulging back tire would explode from the weight, or that the loose wood fall off the back and kill someone--hopefully it would be someone else because as long as my parachute opens, I'm fine.

Even though we agreed on a price, I gave the guy an extra $50 because 1) that's what I thought he should've charged me in the first place; and 2) I'd like him to come back next time I have stuff I need to get rid of (and by that I mean construction debris, not dead hookers).

So all in all...things are improving little by little.

In other news...my finger is still broken, but I did manage to take a couple of muay thai kickboxing classes. I did the kicks and punched with my left hand. I'd like to get back to "the jistu" (as my girlfriend calls it), but it was a good workout and I think it will help me from getting fat while I recuperate, plus it's probably better than sitting around trying to watch Lost re-runs to get caught up.

I am fine...and so am I

Why do people keep asking me if I'm okay? I was not on the metro train that crashed yesterday. 1) I wasn't even at work yesterday; 2) even if was on the train, what would I be doing in Takoma Park(what would anyone be doing in Takoma, besides buying patchoulli or recycling?); and 3) there's millions of people in the DC area...calling to see if I was one of the two people who died is like calling in to see if I won the Lottery because you heard it was someone in DC.

I am kind of flattered by the concern, but I also get off the phone quickly because I secretly wonder if people are using the train crash as an excuse to call me and when I say that I am fine, using that as an excuse to borrow money.

Doctor Shmoctor!

Well, after another doctor visit and X-ray, it turns out that my finger is still broken. This guy was an orthopedic doctor with signed thank you jerseys from Mia Hamm and some other athletes, so he supposedly knows what he's doing. Well, he'll be getting no signed gi from me. Partly because those things are expensive, but also because I don't like what he told me. Four more weeks of no training? I'm already starting to get fat from lack of jiu jitsu. Not fat-kid-who-cries-during-kickball fat, but definitely not my normal self. I got the 5-months pregnant-mellon-belly thing going on. I've been getting antsy and actually went to a muay thai class yesterday and did the kicks and (left) punches, but apparently Dr McFraidypants doesn't even want me doing that.

Me: Well...what am I supposed to do for exercise then?

Dr: you could run...

Me: no, I hate running...I'd rather be fat

Dr: how about yoga? or pilates? it's great for core strength.

Me: Yeah, I heard with practice it can really strengthen your uterus.

What's more, is that after 4 more weeks I will have "functional strength" in my finger, but it won't be as strong as before for several months, so I have to take it easy or it might break again...but worse. So basically, I took half a day off work, paid for more x-rays and co-pays just for him to tell me bad news? That sucks. If I'm paying you, you should tell me good things! Tell me that it's healing faster than usual; that you validate parking; will give me more vicodin; and that a magic unicorn will take me back to my car. You suck!

I don't get it..

I'm not a huge fan of unions. It doesn't look like they did GM, Ford or Chrylser a whole lot of good. However, I can understand how it's human nature to want to be paid more for doing the same thing you would normally be doing.

I also get the concept of picket lines. The goal is to annoy people and whine and stomp your feet like a child until someone gets frustrated enough to just give in to your immature demands and give you what you want so that you will shut the hell up. But...I don't get the giant rat...WTF???

Okay, it's annoying when you're banging those drums loudly and I can't concentrate. And it's even more annoying when I read in the newspaper about how you hire homeless people to walk the picket line because the unions are too lazy to even stand in their own line. But a giant rat? Seriously? I was going to stop and ask what it's about, but, like conceptual art, I think it means whatever you want it to mean, and it's not supposed to make sense.

Weekend 'Fun'

They say bad things come in threes. Anyone who doubts this should count the number of terms a Bush has been in the White House, or the number of exes I have name Catherine.

Well, this weekend I lost my GF among the 50,000+ people at the Race for the Cure, at the national mall. Then, I got a flat tire, and as I was leaving the tire repair place...I got into a car accident. I took the rest of the weekend off...just in case.

Finishing touches.

Well, after two years of awkwardly opening and closing the doors on my kitchen cabinets, I decided on the right handle and put them on. It didn't really take me two years to decide on the handles, I just had more important things going on in my life and kitchen door handles were pretty low on the queue. These were installed when my Dad visited recently. They look great because we used a "jig", not because either of us is obsessive compulsive.



Here is a "jig" that you use to make sure all the holes for the handles are drilled in the same place. You can make one pretty easilly, putting the holes where you need them. We made this out of scrap wood.













This is how you use it...perfect every time.














And here is the finished product.

Ouch!

I broke my middle finger. The Xray says it's not a small break either. I have a splint on it, so I can give the middle finger to everyone with impunity, which is good, but it hurts like hell, which is bad. They gave me vicodin, which is VERY good (especially with beer), but I only take it at home because it makes me very loopy and that's not so good at work or when I'm driving.

I broke it in jiu jitsu. I actually heard the snap, and instead of doing the smart thing (stopping) I taped it to my other finger and kept going. There were some people visiting our school who were training for the mundials so I was eager to test my skillz against that level, but I guess my ego got in the way...lesson learned. Oh well, at least now I have a cool anecdote and my girlfriend thinks I'm a badass (or a dumbass, take your pick).