See You Around...Maybe

I think I'm taking a break from Blogging for a while. I’ll decide in a month or two if it will permanent. I have not been myself lately so I think I'm taking a break from blogging for a while. I don't know if it will be permanent like Liberal Banana or The Daily Dump, but I don't want to be one of those people who quits then comes back and claims that he missed you people. I won't miss you...unless you’re a hottie, in which case I will. Anyway, there is some stuff going on right now that is keeping me busy and stressed at the same time. I won’t discuss it here since it doesn’t have anything to do with home improvement, ninja news or random libertarian rants (and lately, Ninja Stock Picks ™) . So I don't feel much like blogging. Also, I am not in a very positive mood lately, and I don't want this blog to veer from moderately acerbic and sardonic to misanthropic and vengeful.


Someone asked me recently which 3 people (alive or dead) I would want to have dinner with. My 3 never change. Judy Greer, Rachel McHottie and Gerard Finneran. Who's the last one? My hero...You see, once in a while you encounter something so over the top that you can't help but admire the nerve on someone. Like the murderer who kills his parents, then asks the court for leniency because he's an orphan. You feel like you gotta' know what makes this guy tick. Gerry was such a man.


Gerard Finneran, was a powerful Wall Street type who was flying to NYC (first class, of course)when the stewardess decided that he had too much to drink and refused to serve him more. Being the take-charge kind of guy that he is, he decided to take matters into his own hands and started grabbing the little bottles off the service cart and serving himself. When the stewardess tried to stop him, he shoved her and knocked her down. Now, this blog doesn't condone boorish behavior in general, and violence against women in particular. But then Gerry did something so over the top that he completely redeemed himself. He stood on top of the beverage cart, dropped his trousers, then crapped on the beverage cart. (he also wiped his butt with the linen napkins, and wiped the "stuff" on his hands off using the seats in first class, but that's not relevant to the analogy). In case you think I'm making that up, I'm not.

See, the crapping on the beverage cart is lot like my blogging. In a way, Gerry and I do the same thing. We consume, process, then disseminate stuff in a way that is both humorous and offensive. But I don’t feel much like shitting on beverage carts for your amusement right now. In fact, if you gave me a choice between blogging and being a proctologist in a Turkish prison, I’d probably kick you in the face for giving me two such repugnant choices right now. And most of you people deserve better than that. If I wanted to expose you people to that kind of negative attitude, I'd just redirect you to Karl Rove's dating blog.



Or tell you to go to a George Allen campaign rally and ask him what he thinks of blacks and jews.








Anyway, I have a half dozen or so half-finished posts that I may post sporadically (like the one where I get my ass kicked by a swan, or the one where I talk about bacon and amsterdam hookers). My Catholic guilt prevents me from wasting things unnecessarily and I don’t think there is any other use for a half-written post about me getting my ass kicked by a swan. But I don't think I'll be devoting much time to this place at least during the next month or two (until what's going on, which I won’t talk about, will probably be resolved). Anyway, if you want to leave comments, feel free. Or if you are a hot chick who likes my writing so much that you’re dying to sleep with me, then write to me at homeimprovementninja@gmail.com...maybe after this is over I'll be back…or maybe not…See ya :)