Friday, August 15, 2008

There's no Place Like Fridays...and a free plug

I got back into town a few days ago. Attending a vegetarian wedding, it turns out, is as strange as it sounds. I liked the wedding, except for the no-meat thing. I like hummus as much as the next guy, but if I go 24 hours without eating meat, I'll probably bite someone. The ninja clan hails from South America where people sometimes eat meat at all 3 meals. And sometimes during snack time.

If my cousin and her husband thought that animals were spared by not having meat at the wedding, they don't know me very well because the next day at brunch I had more bacon in one sitting than I ever had in my life. I can feel my veins clogging as I type this....mmmmmmm....bacon!!! Although I'm dating a vegetarian, she did not come to the wedding. I wasn't born yesterday and I know that the quickest way to end a relationship is to present all the dysfuntional members of your family to someone at the same time. It's like if someone asks you for a quarter for the soda machine and you hit them in the face with a giant sack of pennies. I know the analogy doesn't make sense to you, but then again you don't know my family.

It was good to see all the family in one place again. It seems like I only get see all of them at once during weddings and funerals, and usually they are better behaved at funerals. I learned some interesting things about vegetarians at the wedding (besides the fact that vegans are just too fcuking smug about how much they love animals), but that would probably make a good follow up post since I don't like too much in one sitting...it starts to feel like work.

BUT...on an unrelated note, I've been having a good week. Yesterday I did something that made me feel like a lawyer again (no, I didn't kick a homeless person or steal from someone's trust fund). I don't think the person I helped realized that my law firm used to bill me out to clients ant $300+ per hour to answer the same kind of questions, but I enjoyed doing it so it doesn't matter if it was free (well, technically it was for two bud lights). And if you're wondering, I don't think my advice was worth $300 per hour since a few of my clients are in federal prison right now (and I wasn't a criminal lawyer). But I look very convincing and authorative in a suit!

Since it's Friday, this weeks free plug goes to Matt Sesow and Dana Ellyn, two artists that I know. They went to china with nothing but their paintbrushes and bought all the paint and canvases in China and shipped their paintings back for their "Made in China" show at the Longview Gallery on 9th street in DC's Chinatown. The opening reception is Saturday from 6-9 pm. I hope that some of my tens of readers can make it.

2 comments:

Lemmonex said...

Vegans are the worst...I swear half of the one I have met wear leather.

Liberal Banana said...

Home Improvement Ninjaaaaa!!!! I'm back! If you get bored and want to check out another DC area blog, please stop by any time. :) And by the way, I think I like the meaning behind the veggie wedding idea but it's not exactly going to convert anyone - as you illustrated so well, Bacon Boy.