Monday, February 13, 2006

More Ninja News: The Valentine Edition

Sometimes, as far as you know, people say to me: Ninja, why don't you make Ninja News a regular feature on your site, and have regular updates like once a something, man?

Here are my thoughts, reduced to word form:

  1. There isn't a whole lotta' ninja news, so a regular feature might be difficult (although nothing is impossible for a shadow warrior);
  2. "regularly scheduled" ninja news is almost an oxymoron. Ninja's are by nature unpredictable. So for the news to be authentic it must be completely unexpected (like a valentines post the day before Valentines day...didn't see that one comin' did ya?);
  3. don't tell me how to run my site, dude. Seriously. Criticising my website, my plumbing, or leaving 20 cubic yards of dirt in my driveway for a year will really upset me;
  4. don't end your sentences with "man"...unless english isn't your first language, in which case, I'll cut you some slack.

Without further ado...the latest Ninja News:

Well, I came across fellow Shinobi who runs a blog called Ask A Ninja. In it, you can ask shadow-warrior related questions (you can still email me with questions about drywall, marble saddles, hardwood flooring and Feng Shui). In this episode, he addresses the issues of Ninjas and dating.

If you’ll recall, the issue of Ninja’s and blind dating were discussed in a
previous issue of Ninja News. Keep an eye out for the forthcoming film on the subject by this Indy filmmaker.

Neither of these two shorts address the issue of whether ninja’s celebrate Valentines day. Let me answer that one: Unless you want your girlfriend to rip your nuts off and shove them down your throat before she rips out your spleen and feeds it to her two cats (one of which already hates you)…then, yes, we do celebrate it…with Tapas.

No comments: